Daddy’s Little Girl

Learning two languages can be very intimidating, but It impacted the person I claim to be today. I was struggling, like really struggling. In my household my family spoke in Spanish but in school I had to switch in a click of a finger to English. My words sometimes didn’t make sense. I had to be in a class full of students trying to learn English. It was so hard for me but I got the hang of it. In the meantime I was dealing with my own problems at home. I was a young child trying to figure out how I could help my father grow his business. I kept asking myself questions, how can I figure this out? Am I too young for this? Will this actually make a difference and make my dad proud? I was a little girl seeing my father going through different stages in life. It affected us as a family but it taught me to use my ability in both languages and help, at least a little, to keep his business running. It was a struggle for me but as time went by, it became a guidance towards my right path.

I grew up with siblings, me as the second youngest. I had two loving parents that always gave me attention. They got me a puppy for my 7th birthday, took us out to play arcade games, movies, parks etc. Life was good. It feels great having a loving family. A father around really helps while growing up as a kid. For me I was a daddy’s girl, my dad loved me and my younger sister to the max. Since we were the only girls in our family, he treated us like queens. He came home with goodies, took us out to traditional parties and experienced the good and bad. My father opened up a piece of my heart I didn’t know I had. My love for writing and reading was because of him. My dad always took me to work during the summer. I saw how his company works, all the bills that needed to be read and signed. All the contracts and details that needed to be done in order to continue the process. My dad taught me his ways in business and I grew up learning and visioning the big English world. My dad inspired me wanting to become big. These moments were so important to me, it had made me want to learn more and become just like him. Reading big words at a young age was not easy but I was slowly progressing with my brothers help. I can say my best childhood memories was learning English with him. It wasn’t as easy for my parents but they tried so hard to understand English in this big world.

Stage one was the hardest for my family. My fathers business was slowly going downhill because he went through depression, he didn’t tell us but we all know he did. Treating us like we meant nothing to him. I never felt more betrayed and hurt. Seeing the man that inspired me, going downhill. The man who told me to never give up, giving up on his own dreams. Younger me would feel beyond hurt, but as I got older I understood why my dad felt this type of way. It also mad me realize I had an ability. He gave me a reason to use my writing skills and use them to help him. Due to alcohol my whole family’s life changed. It was the turning point for me. I was young. I was scared. My household was so gloomy and so gray, almost like nothing on the earth had one living soul. It changed my perspective completely on how I should present myself. Living with my brothers and sister was the only thing I had left. My brother protected us when things got hard. My older brother was like my second father. He already had the mindset of an adult at a young age and following his steps, I knew I had to too. I wasn’t regular like my classmates in the 2nd grade, I was a bit more mature and already speaking in a professional manner but I was shy and embarrassed. I thought everyone would not want to be my friend because I did not speak like them. Going home and trying to read Spanish to my mother explaining how my dad ended up there. All the unfinished jobs his customers were complaining about. All the emails that kept coming in English. My mother was overwhelmed and couldn’t understand, I was there trying to help her.

Stage two was getting overwhelming but starting to get better. I was learning how to respond to my dad’s emails in a professional manner. I sometimes had to make phone calls to big people while translating it to my mother when my brothers weren’t around. You are probably wondering where my dad was through all of this, My dad was detained and led out with warning, until warning wasn’t the case anymore. For months my family didn’t see my father. But when it was my day to go see him, I woke up super early, ate my breakfast and was so excited to finally talk to him. It was quite a process to spend only one hour with my father. I was with my mother but this process was not for her. I had to talk to the people in the front desk and translate it back to my mom. It was not easy for me either because I would have anxiety thinking I will mess up my sentence. It was a process that took hours. How could my dad do that to himself and leave us behind? When visiting time was over, I always gave my dad the biggest hug ever, feeling his bright uniform on my chest and telling him how everything was going with myself and the company. My dad saying he’s proud of him and so thankful for helping my mom. At this point I had to miss school, a perfect attendance student, just to try and respond to emails while being with my mom to help her understand. I could honestly say it was a scary, stressful experience. This whole journey made me realize my ability to write in Spanish and speak it. It made a difference to my dad’s company. The past put me in the position where I learned and gave me a mindset to be the person I am today. I want to be that person who people look up to. Growing up learning two languages wasn’t easy. I know I will keep on growing. I know this is only the beginning. I’m excited for what’s next to come.

Life can be a struggle. Overcoming your fears and learning from your experience is the best way to grow in my opinion. I’m blessed with what I have learned and grateful that I can become the person I truly see myself in the future. I know I have potential and I keep myself motivated to become a stronger and better person for myself. That can be in English and Spanish. Life is only given one time and we have to decide what to do with it. I see myself going through obstacles and overcoming them with the skills I have learned and will learn. Thank you to my family, especially my father, for bringing up the light in me and opening my eyes to a brighter future. I’m glad to say my dad is here seeing me grow as a person and seeing how he impacted my life in a way that will make him proud. My dad is a better person now and he understood what it caused us to feel the way we did. My father’s business is still running to this day and yes sometimes I do still help him when he doesn’t understand. My dad is my motivation and I know in his heart, I will forever be his little girl.